You know, I'm a pretty lucky girl. I've got family close by, I've got a great place to live, I've got friends all over the world, I've got my health, I've got enough money to do the things I want to do. But most of all, I've got the greatest BFF a girl could ever have. I've never officially introduced my gay. And don't worry, he's not offended. He's known as Homie Lover Friend, my gay boyfriend, and my mom's (she wishes) future son-in-law. But most of all, he's known as Nathaniel. He is the light of my life and the wind beneath my wings.
So, basically I need to give you this preface, because I almost did the unimaginable. I kind of half cheated on my gay. During Pride weekend earlier this summer, Nathaniel and I ran into an old friend we hadn't really seen since high school and it was quickly decided that this old friend (also gay) and I would be hanging out in the near future. Fine. Good deal. This is the guy that took me to Sophomore Homecoming, and decided to come out just after dating me. Fucking fabulous. Gold star for my ego, eh?
Anygay, I tell Nathaniel about this meeting, because he has to be prepared, right? He promptly tells me, "You better not leave me. It'll be like Siamese Fighting Fish. You'll have to lower me down in a bag and let us smell each other for a while." So I assure him that I will never leave him and that I plan on hanging out and that's it. No funny business.
So the hang out begins. I pick up GJ at his boyfriends house in the U District. That was fine, but I have a pounding headache from no breakfast and plenty of coffee. Our plan was to go to my house, have some drinks and then make sushi. Well, I didn't make the rice the night before like I was supposed to, so making sushi was out. But drinking was still on the menu. We stop at the liquor store and grab a bottle of vodka and as we're driving home, he insists on changing my radio stations and turning up the volume and just plain messing with stuff that he shouldn't!! I'm not into picking fights about this, so I let it go. Until he lands on some stupid tweeny pop Hannah Montana Jonas Brothers blend that just makes me want to puke. He turns it up and I promptly turn it down with my handy steering wheel adjustments, but then he turns it up again! This went back and forth a few times until I turned it down one last time, looked at him and said, "J!!! I told you I have a headache - stop turning it up!!" And it starts.
The whole day was filled with crap like this. We got to the house and started making drinks, which I didn't even drink. I was so not in the mood when I got home. So we put on a movie - Angels in the Outfield. It's a classic, ok? Danny Glover, that 3rd Rock From The Sun kid, Maggie (who also played the Bird Lady in Home Alone), and JP (who meets the movie's entire cuteness quota!). Apparently though, GJ thinks the movie is stupid and complained the whole time that he forgot how dumb it was. This starts my furious texting to Nathaniel begging him to come over and rescue me. I've made a huge mistake, I won't ever do it again, please take me back!!
So then GJ and I went to sushi at Sushi Land and... Can you be any pickier? "Their selection sucks. Don't they have any spicy tuna?" Que the eye roll here. The drive home was the best... I put on my music. I blasted a bit of Li'l Wayne for his stuck up ass. The entire way he continued to tell me how much he hates Hip Hop. If you know me, you probably know this is the wrong thing to say to me. I side-glared him up and down with raised eyebrows and turned it up louder. I finally dropped him off and immediately called my gay.
Moral of the story is: nothing can calm me down like my gay. I swear, if he was straight, I'd totally marry him.