Monday, December 22, 2008

i should have brought my own

Pike Place is cool, but I am highly disappointed in one certain establishment. Lowell's. Apparently it's been around since Jesus, but I was not impressed. Nathaniel and I went there a few days ago while walking in the snow and ordered grilled cheese sandwiches but asked to have a tomato thrown in there as well. Tell me why the hell these bitches charged me $4 fucking dollars for a god damned slice of tomato?! Is that even legal???? I should have just walked across the aisle and bought a $.75 tomato of my own and told them to just fucking cut it up. Bitches - it's a conspiracy, I tell you - conspiracy!!!

doesn't that hurt their beaks?

So my gay and I were walking around downtown the other day and happened across Ivar's on the waterfront. We went inside to get away from the cold, even though all we really wanted was fish and chips. Upon getting inside, we realized we could get the same exact fish and chips for about 10 dollars cheaper from the outside vendor. He ordered prawns and chips and I got new cajun style fish and chips - wicked good!! Anyfish, we head over to the enclosed seating area that's made of plexi-glass windows and filled with plenty of heaters. We sit down and immediately notice there are about 5 pigeons roaming around, stuck inside. But things didn't get really exciting until the pigeons starting flying full speed into the windows and promptly falling down with that calm head bob as if nothing happened. I almost died laughing when I figured out what had happened. We even tried throwing fries at them to lure them towards the door to let them out, but they wouldn't even follow us - they just kept flying themselved directly into the glass. All I could think about was The Bee Movie's classic line, "Maybe this time...Maybe this time...Maybe this time..." Fuckin stupid birds...

i have to look at it

I'm so curious!!

What kind of life is that?!

fukkin finally

I haven't written in forever. Forgive me. It's been quite the 2 months, I assure you. Between Caribbean vacations, car crashes, less than dim pigeons, Seattle storms and a $4 slice of tomato, I've been more than busy.... Stay tuned for updates of it all!!
word on the street is...