Are animated animals the devil? I vote yes. I went to The Rainforest Cafe this weekend, and I gotta say, it even scared me. The Rainforest Cafe is a restaurant that features animated elephants, snakes, alligators, gorillas, and other random rainforest animals in addition to huge fish tanks spread around the restaurant. Not only are these animals are so jerky and fake looking that you'd have to be 4 to believe they were cool, it made me wonder who in the world sits around a conference table and makes up a restaurant like this (which could be a really cool idea) and decides to hire the guy that makes gorilla suits out of Gladiator chests and and black horse hair? Correct me if I'm wrong, but if I'm paying someone to create the one thing in my restaurant that makes it what it is, I'm going to damn well make sure that the glue holding the hair on isn't showing. Needless to say, I think I saw about 3 children cry at the creepy gorillas, especially the baby one hanging from the ceiling. However, there was one truly great thing about them. The only thing that indicated whether they were male or female were their boobs. If they were tight and muscular, they were male. If they were deflated and saggy, they were female. Rude, right? Who said all girly gorillas have to have saggy boobs? Anyway, I'm sitting there staring at a particularly creepy male gorilla whose long hair is hanging over its face and his gigantic arms are grabbing two trees in front of him, which he shakes like he's having a spasm when he 'comes alive'. With that being said, before I had noticed the boob differences, I say to Nathaniel, "I think this one's a girl." He doesn't even blink, he simply states in his gayest, "Well yea. It has bangs." I told him to stop because I was going to pee. I swear, my gay is the funniest ever....It has bangs....
Here are some pictures of the creepy gorillas. Notice the boob difference. Sick.
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